high pressure and steamy cold

 morning:

woke up rather early to work. started by getting ready and making breakfast (coffee not needed). i had some left overs and while i ate my breakfast i watched some youtube videos that i have since forgotten. i was about to get to work when e messaged me "want a ride to goodwill?". earlier in the week i had mentioned to her that i wanted to get some new t-shirts and a good starting point would be goodwill. since i was thinking of work i asked her about the time and when she said after lunch i was locked in. i had already accepted the invitation before i knew the time. i couldn't pass up an opportunity to go outside, i've been cooped up in my apartment because it's been way too cold to go out walking. 

However this was perfect. i had time to work in the morning, then maybe eat some light lunch and then go and hang out with my friend. 

afternoon:

of course i didn't do any work. i spent the rest of the morning organizing little things here and there, watching more youtube, and some time talking to family peeps. as the afternoon surprised me, i intended to make some food and that's precisely when e texted she'd pick me up in ten minutes. of course! the moment i decided to do something productive is when i run out of time. classic me. 

e was waiting in the car with dv. most fun. he was excited to see me and so was i to see him. we had our headbutt salute and a couple of licks and we were on our way. e was playing some interesting tunes that turned out to be the ep of a producer. i was surprised. you don't usually hear of people seeking out a specific producer's music. we talked about how in pop music the performer is usually not the writer or composer or producer of the songs. she asked me if i never pay attention to producers and writers of music. i felt little bad that i usually don't. i should pay more attention to that. i guess most of the artists i listen to write and produce their own stuff. we also talked about the latest tswift adventures. we both had different takes on it but we both agreed that there's nothing really altruistic about it. i still think it's cool that she did it, but e kinda feels she is bypassing the initial contract she signed? i don't know where she was going with that but we both agreed that people are making out to be a much bigger deal than it is. it is not the cure for cancer people.

we arrived at goodwill and we had to leave dv in the car while we went inside (i always feel bad leaving dv in the car, i wish places would just let people bring in their dogs...in a dream world perhaps). e had some donations to give and was cool enough to take me as well to see if i could find some shirts. we rummaged through their stuff and found a couple of cool ones. it's hard to know the real size of the shirts because even though they have the same letters in the tag, they varied in size quite a bit. we got some cool designs and then walked around the store. we found some funny stuff, talked about what would be cool to have in the house, laughed at some weird stuff. then as if by magic she found the coolest ceramic french press. it's pretty, has nice blue colors, a good handle, cool looking feet, and enough volume for two to three cups. it's "meant to be". mainly because that's what is printed on the side of it. i had been wanting to get a french press for a while now but this one was perfect. i liked the look and the filter and plunger were intact. also, e found it. during the checkout process the song that i wanted us to play and sing together started playing too. ha! 

One the way out e asked me if i would mind accompanying her to run some more errands. the little stinger of work poked my brain. "i'd love to go with you" i said before i even knew where we would go. She also said that we could pass by another goodwill to see if we could find better shirts. 

so i surrendered to being happy.  

i found some new shirts at goodwill. i also found a really nice design i wanted in a shirt that was not my size but e said that she could sew it onto another shirt and make a hybrid of shirts! i was taken aback, that seems like so much work! i felt bad asking that of her, but she made it seem like it would be easy and even fun for her. so i didn't push back much. i will pay her back in baked goods. e bought some cool glass bottles for her plants. We went to target and then on to the car wash. 

The car wash was like something out of a movie. imagine blade runner, akira, or any retro futuristic place. only there was only color for the neon lights, tan. still, steam filled the room while vehicles sat in different levels of cleanliness. the sounds of high pressured hoses and spurting soap brushes were muddled by walls and the ever thickening fog. e got out of the car and took off her coat. she took the hose with her two hands and started to clean the car. i was on money duty, making sure the machine kept working by putting in coins at the right time. the handle of the hose was very gun like, and the shaft had some sort of rubberized ripples. e held it like a machine gun. it sprayed water like a futuristic laser. she was wearing an off-white baggy sweater and what looked like metallic dark gray leggings. the overhead harsh white fluorescent lights were scattered by the steam and it made e look unreal. beyond human, like a nymph that traveled to the future. her legs would come in and out of focus, her arms would move as if in a dance, her body glided through the heavy air, the only anchor was her bun. that bun that shined blonde one minute, brunette the next, and dark brown the following. it was a magical moment. there was e, fighting invisible monsters, and i was her support. we could have taken the world by storm, but then the car was clean and we had to go home. 

back home i got to walk a bit with dv, i wish it were warmer so i could ask e if i can walk him. the play time was too short. 

evening:

made dinner and played a little guitar. watched tv. i planned on working but realized that my boss has meetings most of the day tomorrow so i can try to supercharge my work for tomorrow. we'll see how that goes haha. e started working on the hybrid shirt! it looks fantastic. i wonder if she likes croissants...

shadow work

thoughts:

while i am glad i still have a vivid imagination, i wonder how many other people live life like that. i remember watching the show Scrubs and feeling that it was so relatable. i wonder if it really is. 

thinking and overthinking

and thinking again

and loving and loving

and loving again

the birds that don't freeze

never leave home

and the heart that doesn't break

never stops thinking about you.