bike group

i woke up today still kind of tired but determined to do something. a warm day can't be tossed away these days. nevertheless i couldn't get out of bed. i started thinking of food items and the hunger finally got me up. unfortunately i didn't have anything fun to eat so i scavenged my kitchen and made myself a semi-sad sandwich. while i ate i thought about what i could do to take advantage of the day.

-i could go do a long bike ride. maybe do a tour around the lakes. 

-i could go grocery shopping in my bike. go to TJs. or Even venture out to whole foods.

-doing things alone is boring. could i invite r to a bike ride? i imagined she's busy. maybe m? nah, she's probably also busy. t? nah, too intense. 

i couldn't find something i truly wanted to do so i decided to try out my hand at crocheting. i got the first two steps down. but it was with the help of a guidance video. once i had to fend for myself i..kinda failed. i couldn't concentrate enough to keep track of my stitches. it was also hard to see them so i couldn't count them to keep track either. 

<i'm falling asleep now so i'll just be super succinct>

 c texted me to invite me to a bike ride. she also invited our mutual friend k. having an opportunity to enjoy the day leaped at the chance. i also decided to try and invite e. maybe doing outside activities with other people can foster some goodwill that sometimes gets lost. to my surprise she accepted the invitation.

so we biked around town. c had some specific locations she wanted to hit up. a tea or coffee place to have a drink (1), then a bookstore (2), then another coffee place for ground beans (3).

1. we opted for bubble tea. so we went to machi machi. a place that's inside an asian supermarket! finally i've gone to a bona fide asian market. and it's not too far from my house! i will definitely be going back there for groceries and other fun goodies. i'll probably go there for stationary and gift giving. looking forward to it. i also want to show it to r. i think she might get a kick out of it and find some cool stuff. the bubble tea was pretty tasty. i also bought a chinese wafer cookies with lemon filling. yummy af. here c offered to take my cookies in her back pack but then e offered to let me use her side bag to carry the left over cookies because it wouldn't fit in my little seat bag "you can use my bag! we live in the same place". which would not be surprising, it only makes sense, if this wasn't the first time that i can remember when she leveraged that we live close as a positive. it was much appreciated nonetheless. i tried to squish my cookies first but they were becoming a pile of crumbs. 

2. the bookstore was almost downtown. it was in a cool place i thought. there was a cool looking coffee place, the bookstore itself was cool looking, and there was a cool looking brewery right adjacent to it. cool looking everything. classic to c, she didn't check to see if the bookstore was open to walk inside and it turns out that they were only doing pick-up orders. but being c she also just straight up talked her way into getting the peeps inside to roam the store and find her book. 

open walled brewery that allows dogs? yes please

3. we then headed to the coffee place. k and e stayed in a nearby parking spot while c and i went inside. c wanted to get my thoughts on what coffee and grind setting to ask, and i was curious about a new coffee place. it was totally empty but for the two baristas. it's a nice place. it's mission is to help the underemployed youth by providing training and opportunities. we chatted with the baristas a bit and i decided to order an espresso while c got her beans ground. it was strong! very strong earthy and burnt caramel notes. a swift kick in my taste buds, in a good way. i also thought they logo was cool and i actually bought a t-shirt from them.  

after the coffee place we headed out back.

on the way back we stopped at one of my other favorite spots in the city. it's this lookout area that's a little hidden from the river path. it was actually e who showed it to me and it was e who suggested we go there again to show it to c and k. it was nice. we talked a little about the snowboarding trip we did for her birthday and when i mentioned that i liked it e exclaimed "what?! i didn't know that!" i replied that i had even told her that i would have liked to go back again and she said she had no recollection of such a conversation. i of course remember because right after i said that i would like to go back and snowboard she replied with "i want to go again with m and his gf" which felt a little strange way to respond and i felt it clearly told me what she thought of me joining her again in such an outing. but then again that conversation was after her bday when she was in what i called an anti-d time. actually now that i think about it, after showing surprise about me liking snowboarding and wanting to go back, and acting surprised that i had told her, she STILL didn't say anything about going back together. the cynic in me thinks she played the part of friend in front of c and k while still not committing to anything. maybe i'm crazy. maybe she's really a friend that gets lost in her own world sometimes. maybe i'm just an over-analyzing idiot machine with WAY too much time by myself in my apartment to pick apart every single thing in my life. 

Oh! we also passed by the melting falls. that was nice. 

 
  

falling in love with biking again. such freedom!

After the overlook we finally headed home. The sun was getting low and the winds were getting colder. everything was beautiful though. the sky was gorgeous and i must confess i felt jealous of e's hair in the wind. her hair seemed to be a flame that burned and sparked with vibrant life, so many colors that it defied even rainbows probably. damn cursed genes. i used to love my hair too haha. especially in the wind. 

once home i again felt the despair of loneliness. despite my whining from above i had a really great time biking with my friends. we had fun conversations and i made them laugh several times which made me feel good about myself and that maybe i am not a waste of space and energy for them. it was the highlight of my week for sure. so now i was home. from a very good high to the empty apartment. i decided not to let it end and made the choice of going downstairs to the brewery and texting friends while drinking a beer or two. be outside a little longer. 

but then! who comes into the bar right after i did? (well more like 10 minutes after, but they were the next customers). mh and wu!! they apparently had a similar thought to myself about staying outside a little longer and came over to the brewery by my house. lucky coincidence! so we then got a table together and just chatted about whatever came to mind. it was fun and we ended up staying until closing time. the bar had also opened it's side "wall" so it was just like being outdoors and it was fantastic.

now in my bed and i'm just chilling. the day felt completely satisfactory. from morning to night i didn't feel so alone today. good shit.

color everywhere